Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control... http://tfl.nu/d926
  Replies (75) Good night (1542) Bad night (4707)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends http://tfl.nu/27cl
  Replies (32) Good night (4318) Bad night (838)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to. http://tfl.nu/mbqt
  Replies (26) Good night (5861) Bad night (1255)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training. http://tfl.nu/j8m4
  Replies (2) Good night (2277) Bad night (776)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard. http://tfl.nu/l7xl
  Replies (10) Good night (3997) Bad night (1026)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now http://tfl.nu/5whe
  Replies (7) Good night (1106) Bad night (2467)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god. http://tfl.nu/4xu8
  Replies (3) Good night (1212) Bad night (928)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night. http://tfl.nu/euw3
  Replies (16) Good night (649) Bad night (2801)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell. http://tfl.nu/vgl2
  Replies (22) Good night (2374) Bad night (1132)
• Favorite

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (320): Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house. http://tfl.nu/jt6d
  Replies (10) Good night (1531) Bad night (556)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die? http://tfl.nu/yj8c
  Replies (11) Good night (1419) Bad night (441)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right? http://tfl.nu/4gj4
  Replies (8) Good night (1511) Bad night (491)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka http://tfl.nu/793g
  Replies (4) Good night (568) Bad night (341)
• Favorite

  (571): View more from Virginia

  My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (571): My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous. (703): Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill. http://tfl.nu/6yt0
  Replies (0) Good night (565) Bad night (288)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (701): Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress http://tfl.nu/1hn4
  Replies (9) Good night (1035) Bad night (567)

Randomize