i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.