Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I pour the whiskey from now on
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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