Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
