I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
