Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
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