Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Randomize