remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize
