"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
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I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
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I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
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