I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
