The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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