boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
