considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
