South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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