A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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