Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
