Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
