Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
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