I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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