so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
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