dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
