Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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