I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Randomize
