just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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