If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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