So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize