i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
