hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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