i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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