Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Just invented taco cereal.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize