she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
My vagina is officially offended.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
