me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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