your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
