I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Randomize
