wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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