I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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