Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
