Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize
