he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
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All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
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I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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