Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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