suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
