Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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