We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
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