lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
we have officially lost it.
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME