No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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