Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
