so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Randomize