Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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