I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
