'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize