Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
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